D'Angelo Russell Broke the 10 Commandments of Guy Code
Sex & Relationships | 

D'Angelo Russell Broke the 10 Commandments of Guy Code

Thou shalt not be a dick.

Breaking Guy Code is a serious violation on anybody's account. It's a breaking of trust amongst friends, and is incredibly difficult to come back from.

Just a few days ago, a video surfaced of what appears to be Los Angeles Lakers guard Nick Young speaking candidly about his relationship with rapper Iggy Azalea. He admits to cheating on Iggy with a 19-year old. Young and Azalea got engaged last June. Ouch.

What he was unaware of, was that it was being recorded by his Lakers teammate, D'Angelo Russell (a rookie, nonetheless). Now, under no circumstances is it ever OK to record a person without their consent. Especially if they're a teammate. ESPECIALLY if they're revealing sensitive info.

Mr. Russell probably didn't have a Guy Code guide in front of him to let him know what the violations were, but relax, we at FlockU have you covered. Here are the 10 commandments of Guy Code.

Thou shalt not date your friend's ex.
This is a no-brainer. The thought shouldn't even cross your mind. Even if he says it's alright-it probably isn't.

Thou shalt not date your friend's mom.
See above.

Thou shalt not cockblock.
Another no-brainer. Blocking someone else is by no means a guarantee that you're gonna get in there either.

Thou shalt not trash another man's name to get with a girl.
Not only is it corny, but immature and unlikely to lead anywhere.

Thou shalt not encourage someone to date a girl you KNOW is bad news.
Huge breach of trust, and should never be done for any reason.

Thou shalt not diffuse sensitive info without verification of facts.
Also known as being a "Chatty Cathy." Grown men should not be gossiping and throwing stuff out there without confirmation.

Thou shalt not bring your significant other out on a guy's night.
This is a serious vibe killer.

Thou shalt not play slows jams when passed the AUX cord.
Are you trying to incite memories of long lost ex's?

Thou shalt not masturbate in another guy's house.
Even taking a dump is more socially acceptable.

Thou shalt never speak of a friend's infidelity.
Cardinal rule of Guy Code. It's none of your business. Volunteering of information is strictly forbidden, and even when interrogated a simple "ask him" will suffice. You're not being asked to lie, just do not speak on it.

*Unless the friend's girlfriend is also a friend of yours. Then you are free of all Guy Code restrictions related to this stipulation.

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Sex & Relationships | 

10 Commandments of Spring Break

The more beads, the less class.

You only get four spring breaks. Only four wild, drunken, and (hardly) memorable trips with your best friends. You have to do it right, which is why I've compiled for you the 10 Commandments of Spring Break (not to be confused with the actual 10 Commandments, which you'll probably revisit after said spring break, tbh).

1.Thou shalt not flash anyone on the beach. If you don't get this point immediately you've clearly never participated in a spring break somewhere like Panama City Beach or Cabo. Or maybe you're just completely clueless as to what beads around a girl's neck means. Here's how it works: When a girl flashes her tits at a guy, she gets a one-cent plastic necklace. Great trade off right? The more beads, the less class. Nothing says trainwreck like taking your top off all day. Don't be that girl.

2.Thou shalt always wrap it before thou tap it. Considering I wrote a previous article about the dudes you'll sleep with on vacation, I'm fully aware and actually in full support of you getting yourself laid. I also realistically know the guy you end up fucking will probably be a stranger. I'm saving you from the worry of an STD or pregnancy scare from a guy you'll probably never see again once the week's over. Not to mention there are a hell of a lot of scumbags out there and who knows what they're carrying around with them. Genital warts are not a great souvenir, just saying.

3.Thou shalt never go out alone. Never ever ever ever. While going out alone is never a great idea, doing it in a wild party town you aren't that familiar with makes this bad idea a worse idea. Not only are you not familiar with the area, you also don't know the people around you or their character. If you're going to hit the town, at least bring one trusted friend along for the ride.

4.Thou shalt always be ready for a party. It's fucking spring break. If you're committing to the party, commit. Part of the fun of college spring breaks is the complete disregard for responsibility for just one short week a year. So live it up while you can, my friends.

5.Thou shalt always stay hydrated. Yes, I had to throw a couple of mom tips in here, just bear with me. I just want to help you make the best of your vaca and I know for a fact after one day of binge drinking and no water you will wish you would have taken my advice. Take a break from the PBR's and Takka every once in awhile and treat your body to a little H2O. You--and your hangover-- will thank me later.

6.Thou shalt always say yes to adventure. No vacations will ever be what a college spring break is. You have four years of your life where you can party as hard and as much as you do. Spring break is that times ten. SYou have four years of your life where you can party as hard and as much as you want. Make all the wild memories you want--ya know, within reason.

7.Thou shalt always remember sunscreen. Last time I go mom on you, I swear. This is just some advice from a girl who's been there, done that. Frying yourself your first day on the beach makes the rest of the week hell. I don't care how drunk you get or how many fun things you have planned, you will not want to do them. Who wants to spend their whole break dreading having a good time just because it literally hurts to do anything? Trust me, 30 SPF and up, my friends. It will save you.

8.Thou shalt not overpack. This is just a burden. All you need is a couple swimsuits, a dress or two, a pair of shorts and a couple tops. It's not a runway, it's a beach. Go low maintenance for a week to make your travel easier.

9.Thou shalt always make it past the pre-game. Do not, I repeat--do not--outdo yourself. Spring break nights are some of the best nights of your life and you want to at least remember a couple of them. Committing too much to the pre-game can lead to you missing out on some pretty great memories.

10.Thou shalt make it one for the books. This commandment needs no further explanation. I'll let you take it from here.

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Sex & Relationships | 

7 Guys You'll Date in College

...you going out tonight?

College boys are strange, mysterious creatures. Each one will confuse you just as much as the last and make you wonder how in the hell people meet their spouses in college. Four-plus years spent at frat parties and college bars will, without a doubt, bring you in contact with these 7 college gems.

1. The frat star: Oh the classic frat star, a staple at any college. As you may have guessed, this guy's interests are as follows: his frat, partying, his frat, and wait for it... his frat. Date parties and formals will be the extent of your romance and good luck trying to hook up without a visit from the roommate. There really is nothing like a grown man (I use that term loosely) living with 200 other grown men (still using loosely). Don't count on this one lasting too long.

2. The "athlete": This one is in quotation marks to signal that club sports don't fucking count. He is not on the actual hockey team; he's on the club hockey team. He'll be very sure to convince you that it's just as big of a deal and that he has a real shot at the NHL.

3. The actual athlete: OK, this one you'll for sure be a little excited about. I mean, hello, athletes are sexy AF. If you date the quarterback of the football team, you can't honestly can't tell me you won't feel like a badass bitch. However, that high typically dies real quick when you realize he lives and breathes his sport and doesn't have a ton of time for you. It's fun while it lasts, but don't count on any commitment.

4. The stage 5 clinger: CODE RED: This guy is going to ruin your social life and your desire to date ever again. He constantly wants to know what you're doing, who you're with, how many children you want, and your social security number. All plans must be run by him and should probably include him. Oh it's your friend's birthday? Doesn't matter, he wants to hang out with you. You were sleeping? Still should have texted back. He has your future planned out, kids names decided, and probably already a retirement spot. GTFO and don't look back.

5. The momma's boy: I had been hanging out with this guy for a little while and one day, he answered the phone and actually said "Hi, Mommy." Mommy. A 20-year-old guy said Mommy. It goes without saying that was the last time we hung out. This guy is weird and needy and extremely not self-sufficient in the least. He probably doesn't know how to use a washing machine or how to cook and will 100 percent assume you are now going to do these things for him. You essentially take the role of his mother--and if that isn't strange to you, it's time to reevaluate.

6. The stoner: In all honesty this is probably one of the nicest, most laid back guys you'll date. (I wonder why.) He's fun for a while, until you realize that he's a little too laid back. He's probably not really that big into dates that don't involve his couch and a bong. You don't really hang out with people other than other stoners and it just gets really fucking boring. I put 3 months tops on relationships with this guy. There's just nothing interesting about being high 24/7.

7. The Wall Street wannabe: If ambition is sexy to you, which it should be, you are going to fall fast and hard for this one. He's got dreams, plans, and a business degree in the works. He's most likely going to be extremely successful and potentially a great guy to consider settling down with. Oh, except he literally only cares about money and success. So scratch that, he's got great potential, but when your world revolves only about how much money you can make it gets a little sad. Don't give up on this one too quickly though, he has potential to grow out of the greed and just be a really successful, great guy.

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Sex & Relationships |  Source: melissanneperez

The Ten Commandments of the Communal Laundry Room

You don't run the show here, dude.

College is, for many students, the first time that we are forced to share a laundry room with many people, none of whom are close relatives. For some, college is the first time students have to do their own laundry at all.

In either case, the following guidelines outline some basic etiquette when sharing laundry machines amongst dozens of people, along with a few tips regarding laundry machine usage.

1. Thou shalt not attempt to do laundry at 8 p.m. on a Sunday night, when all other residents of the building have also realized they have no clean socks and underwear for the upcoming week.

Source: tumblr.com

2. Thou shalt not leave their laundry in machine for more than five minutes beyond cycle completion. Thou shalt set an alarm to retrieve their laundry at the appropriate time because other people are waiting on the machines.

Source: columbiaspectator.com

3. Thou shalt not move another person's clothes from a machine if other machines are available. If no other machines are available, thou shalt wait a 15 minute grace period before moving another person's clothes.

Source: giphy.com

4. If one opens a machine while mid-cycle with another one's clothes, thou shalt close the door and restart it. Thou shalt not leave another's laundry in cyclic limbo. This wastes its owner's time and money, because they have to pay to restart the machine and spend extra, unexpected time on laundry.

Source: giphy.com

5. If one must move another person's clothing, thou shalt place it in the provided container, be it bag or basket. Not the floor or precariously piled atop a machine.

Source: imgur.com

6. Thou shalt occupy no more than 2 machines at a time.

Source: giphy.com

7. Thou shalt not leave behind smelly wet socks to mold. Thou shalt keep track of all items that are theirs.

Source: giphy.com

8. Thou shalt not jam the coin slot with quarters or the machine with clothing. Transgression of either rule will put the machine out of commission indefinitely.

Source: illinoiscoinlaundry.com

9. Thou shalt not use three times the necessary amount of soap in the washing machine, or a Great Flood will ensue.

Source: giphy.com

10. Thou shalt CLEAN THE LINT TRAP. Leaving behind your hair and fuzz is both gross and dangerous.

Source: giphy.com

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Sex & Relationships |  Source: nypost.com

I Hate Being A New York Sports Fan

But I'm not gonna stop.

I hate being a New York sports fan.

Why, you may ask? Because although we have arguably the biggest media market in the world as one of our selling points, it's also our Achilles heel.

There is no patience in markets like these (Los Angeles as well) and honestly, fans are tough. I believe 100 percent that New York fans are some of the best in the world, but in a market that is so used to success, when it's not there, it feels like the life is sucked out of a city. Big-market teams want so badly for their teams to be good that they push for rash decision making with the hope that it'll take them one step closer to a championship.

When has there been a time in sports where the New York and Los Angeles markets have been so irrelevant in basketball? The Knicks are dreadful, and although they seemingly found a diamond in Kristaps Porzingis, they don't have the draft picks necessary to surround him with the right players. The Lakers were only relevant this year because everybody wanted to see Kobe limp to the finish line and D'Angelo Russell become the worst teammate ever. The once exciting and electrifying Lob City Clippers are old news, and frankly, not that good.

I remember being at the 2009 Yankees championship parade and how alive the city felt. Everybody was always in a good mood and there was always something to talk about. The games were must-see-tv; the good times were rolling.

Sports have an effect on people unlike anything we've ever seen. It's almost magical. In big media markets such as Los Angeles and New York, the fans and media know that too, and that's why we are all so critical. We know what it's like to be at the top and we also know what it's like to be at the bottom. We constantly live in fear of the bottom, but chase for the top leaving us right where we see our beloved teams now. Treading water.

Everybody loves to say that big market teams have such an advantage over others, and while this may be true in some aspects, I don't give it much weight. Being in a big market is the exact reason the Knicks are tied to Carmelo Anthony (I do love Carmelo, but trading him is vital for a successful rebuild) and the Yankees refuse to trade any of their vaunted bullpen trio.

As a result of the situations many big market teams are put in I have to wonder, when will New York get its next championship? When will LA? Is there even a championship in sight for these two power markets?

Whether this championship is in sight or not (LeBron or no LeBron, we've still gotta be closer than Cleveland), as a fan I have no choice but to fight through the negativity and hope that maybe, one of my teams can do the impossible. It's why we Giants (and Jets fans) think every year is our year, because there's nothing else we can do but root root root for our home team.

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Sex & Relationships | 

The 10 Commandments of Girls' Night

These nights are sacred, people!

1.Thou shalt never let a guy get in the way of girls' night. This is No. 1 for a reason. Time with your girls is a MUST and really the only way to maintain sanity. A boy is never an excuse to turn down a girls' night.
2.Thou shalt never out pregame herself. Listen girl, been there done that. We've all consumed a few too many Taaka shots and passed out on the bathroom floor before the party even started. Save it for another night, because girls' night, as previously mentioned, is not to be missed for anything. Pace yourself. You can pass out in the tub at the end of some other night.
3.Thou shalt let no outfit go unapproved. Never, and I mean NEVER tell your friend the dress that makes her look four months pregnant makes her look good. This is a terrible thing to do to someone you care about. You never know what the night could bring, a run in with an ex; an encounter with that bitch you hate, or on a more positive note, a run in with true love. Make sure your girls are on their A game.
4.Thou shalt always play wing-woman to single friends If ya girl's lonely, help a sista out. If it's been a while, help a sista out. Paint the town red and score a few numbers. If you have the privilege of a boyfriend, help spread the wealth a little. If you can't find your girl her knight in shining armor, you can at least help her end her dry spell.

5.Thou shalt always have another glass of wine. This should really just go without saying. Let no bottle go unfinished and no glass left half empty. It's girl's night; pour another (and then a couple more).
6.Thou shalt always Instagram a group pic Like, did girls' night even happen if it didn't make it to the 'Gram? Instagram was literally invented for the sole purpose of posting girls' night pictures... maybe don't quote me on that.
7.Thou shalt absolutely not Instagram a drunken picture Nope. Do not do it. I promise you will regret it in the long run. No one ever looks as good as you think in a drunk picture; and even though you think it's not obvious that you're completely plastered in it, your mother, grandmother, and anyone else on Facebook/Insta/Snapchat are fully aware.
8.Thou shalt always have thou girl's back. At least one of your friends is destined to get hit on by some creep at the bar or make the mistake of letting their beer goggles judge how hot the guy they're trying to flirt with is. Please be a real friend and stop this shit in its tracks. You will be their hero when you're laughing about the story in the morning. No one wants to go to bed with a 10 and wake up with a 4. It's rough.
9.Thou shalt never go home with a guy at the end of girls night Sure flirting with guys is perfectly appropriate and even encouraged, but don't ditch your clique. Girl's night means you stick with your girls and your girls only. You leave with the same number you came with.

10.Thou shall always prevent thou friends from drunk texting exes.If he's an ex, don't text him and don't let your girls text their respective exes. Someone will either cry or participate in a very questionable hookup, both fantastic ways to ruin a killer girls night. Phones really should just be turned off in general (after pictures are posted of course).