Spring Break One-Piece Guide
The Real World |  Source: @brittneyborowski

Spring Break One-Piece Guide

Screw paying for separates.

Spring Break is fast approaching, which means it's time to get down to business making sure all the essentials are covered, like your swimsuit. I don't know about you, but my main bikini from last year has definitely seen better days.

I'm currently in the market for a new suit because I don't care how toned and sculpted your butt is, a saggy pair of bottoms can really bring down a look (lol).

Websites and magazines constantly advertise bikinis, but the other day I went shopping and decided to try on a one piece. The results? I looked and felt great!

I decided to browse for more one-pieces online during my work breaks, and WHO KNEW!! There are hundreds, probably thousands, of super flattering one pieces out there to choose from.

Why don't we promote one-pieces more often? My suspicion is that the bathing suit industry just wants to make us pay more for the "separates." I mean REALLY, do you think I'm about to go out commando?

That said, here's a list of eight solid styles to choose from that are sure to make your Spring Break (and Insta, who are we kidding) a hit!

Attention Grabbing
Nothing says fun in the sun like a cheeky (ha) and attention grabbing phrase on your one piece.


Tropical Print
This topical print is the definition of simple, yet sexy with the deep plunge.



Only the daring should try this one. You may have some interesting tan lines afterwards, but you're sure to turn heads in this colorful cut-out one piece.


Stripes are always a classic, and this nautical take is sure to have you ready for the high seas!


Again, who says one pieces can't be sexy? Dare we say the detailing makes this suit look classy and smoking at the same time.


Mesh Paneling
All the allure of a two piece... yet in a one piece. Genius.


Technically this is for surfing, but it's cute enough to wear without any intention of hitting the waves. Maybe you just got too burned after day one, thanks to not seeing the sun for three months straight.


If you're a lifetime member of the Itty Bitty Titty Committee like I am, fringe is a great way to bring some volume to the area.


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The Real World | 

10 Commandments of Spring Break

The more beads, the less class.

You only get four spring breaks. Only four wild, drunken, and (hardly) memorable trips with your best friends. You have to do it right, which is why I've compiled for you the 10 Commandments of Spring Break (not to be confused with the actual 10 Commandments, which you'll probably revisit after said spring break, tbh).

1.Thou shalt not flash anyone on the beach. If you don't get this point immediately you've clearly never participated in a spring break somewhere like Panama City Beach or Cabo. Or maybe you're just completely clueless as to what beads around a girl's neck means. Here's how it works: When a girl flashes her tits at a guy, she gets a one-cent plastic necklace. Great trade off right? The more beads, the less class. Nothing says trainwreck like taking your top off all day. Don't be that girl.

2.Thou shalt always wrap it before thou tap it. Considering I wrote a previous article about the dudes you'll sleep with on vacation, I'm fully aware and actually in full support of you getting yourself laid. I also realistically know the guy you end up fucking will probably be a stranger. I'm saving you from the worry of an STD or pregnancy scare from a guy you'll probably never see again once the week's over. Not to mention there are a hell of a lot of scumbags out there and who knows what they're carrying around with them. Genital warts are not a great souvenir, just saying.

3.Thou shalt never go out alone. Never ever ever ever. While going out alone is never a great idea, doing it in a wild party town you aren't that familiar with makes this bad idea a worse idea. Not only are you not familiar with the area, you also don't know the people around you or their character. If you're going to hit the town, at least bring one trusted friend along for the ride.

4.Thou shalt always be ready for a party. It's fucking spring break. If you're committing to the party, commit. Part of the fun of college spring breaks is the complete disregard for responsibility for just one short week a year. So live it up while you can, my friends.

5.Thou shalt always stay hydrated. Yes, I had to throw a couple of mom tips in here, just bear with me. I just want to help you make the best of your vaca and I know for a fact after one day of binge drinking and no water you will wish you would have taken my advice. Take a break from the PBR's and Takka every once in awhile and treat your body to a little H2O. You--and your hangover-- will thank me later.

6.Thou shalt always say yes to adventure. No vacations will ever be what a college spring break is. You have four years of your life where you can party as hard and as much as you do. Spring break is that times ten. SYou have four years of your life where you can party as hard and as much as you want. Make all the wild memories you want--ya know, within reason.

7.Thou shalt always remember sunscreen. Last time I go mom on you, I swear. This is just some advice from a girl who's been there, done that. Frying yourself your first day on the beach makes the rest of the week hell. I don't care how drunk you get or how many fun things you have planned, you will not want to do them. Who wants to spend their whole break dreading having a good time just because it literally hurts to do anything? Trust me, 30 SPF and up, my friends. It will save you.

8.Thou shalt not overpack. This is just a burden. All you need is a couple swimsuits, a dress or two, a pair of shorts and a couple tops. It's not a runway, it's a beach. Go low maintenance for a week to make your travel easier.

9.Thou shalt always make it past the pre-game. Do not, I repeat--do not--outdo yourself. Spring break nights are some of the best nights of your life and you want to at least remember a couple of them. Committing too much to the pre-game can lead to you missing out on some pretty great memories.

10.Thou shalt make it one for the books. This commandment needs no further explanation. I'll let you take it from here.

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The Real World |  Source: YouTube

Your Guide To Spring Break Hook Ups

I shouldn't have to tell you, but use protection.

One of the hottest hookups I ever had was the product of Spring Break. I was on a large organized trip to Puerto Vallarta, Mexico. It was the first night and the club was filled primarily with spring breakers looking to get drunk and fucked.

Eventually, I caught the eyes of a boy I had hooked up with a year before. With our mutual friend passed out drunk beside us, we had 69-ed just a lil bit. When our eyes connected, we both knew something was going to happen again.

He wandered toward me, asking me to dance. All those years of middle school grinding seemed to finally pay off because it wasn't long before he began kissing me. After some DFMOing, I spotted my friend flirting with his friend, and we rambled over for group shots.

The boys suggested we head back to their villa for a nightcap. My friend pulled me aside, saying, "I'm not dying to hook up with him, but if you want to hook up with your boy, I'll go with you." All I could think about was fucking this boy, so, I selfishly told her I wanted to, and she agreed to come along.

Back at the villa, he brought me to the pool for drinks and a spliff, where we decided to go skinny dipping. In the water, we had fun kissing and touching each other all over, but, after a while realized how fucking cold we were. Both of our nipples were hard AF and not in a sexy way.

He led me out of the pool and into a bathroom, turning the showers and me on. As we kissed, he lifted me up, moving me towards the sink. With my legs wrapped around him, we were totally enthralled in each other and the steam from the shower.

Hand-in-hand and mouth-on-mouth we stepped into the water. Eventually, I eased onto my knees to go down on him. I let him finish all over my chest, assuming the water would wash it off (I found out the next day it had very much stuck, and would sunburn extra in the semen crusted areas).

After the shower, we searched the villa for a bed, ultimately settling on sharing one with his fraternity brother PTFO. Once in bed, he whispered in my ear that it was my turn to come and started fingering me. While it did feel nice, both of us were so tired and drunk we fell asleep with his hands down my pants.

My friend shook me awake early the next morning. We knew we had to get out of there, but didn't have working phones, cash, or any idea of where we were or how to get home. Remaining in his boxer briefs and a neon yellow shirt that read "SB2K15," I put on my heels and ventured out with my friend and a random boy from the villa that thought he knew the way back to our hotel.

Admittedly, I took risky chances in pursuit of a Spring Break hookup. It turned out hot and fine, but my carelessness could have ended disastrously. Obviously, the way to stay safest on Spring Break is not to go home with someone.

But, in the event you do choose to go home with someone, be safe and smart. Take this story and these tips as a guide on how to maximize the hot water you make out in and minimize the proverbial hot water you could find yourself in.

1. Set expectations.
If you don't want to go home with anyone, tell your friends so they can hold you to it. If you don't want to go home with someone after a certain level of drunkenness, give your friends a standard and have them help you figure out if and when you get there. Set up rules, like no going home with strangers, only hooking up at your place, or only going somewhere with a friend.

2. Be prepared.
Have an idea of the details involved in the pursuit- the name and address of your hotel, a fully charged phone and way to contact friends, an idea of how to get home afterwards, cash, condoms, and anything else you might need to stay safe.

3. Have a friend in on it.
Introduce the hookup to your friend for them to check for any red flags. Before going anywhere, give a friend all the details you can on your plan - where you are going, what time you plan on returning, the name and number of the person you are going with. And make sure the hookup is aware that someone knows all this information.

4. Don't do anything you don't want to.
Don't feel coerced into going home with someone. If you feel even a little bit hesitant, don't go; this is a more risky scenario than a frat mixer, so be cautious.

5. Use protection.
As they say in The Hangover, "what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. Except for herpes. That shit'll come back with you." It's 2017...I shouldn't have to explain why you should wear a condom.

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The Real World | 

Seven Reasons Why Spring is Detrimental to a College Student's Motivation

It's nice out, don't make me study.

We've been waiting for spring since probably the first day of winter; and it's finally on the horizon. It's all sunshine and blooming flowers until we check our grades. Let's face it: our GPAs don't welcome spring as willingly as we do.

Spring Break drowns all motivation.
One bad thing about SB (besides what it does to your bank account) is that it takes every bit of your focus and drowns it in the ocean. A break is great, but it's hard to get back in the groove after a week of fun and sun. The seven-day hangover following SB definitely doesn't help, either.

March Madness brings drunken gladness.
What's better than basketball every night? Having an excuse to drink for weeks straight is a total win--unless you consider what drinking every night instead of studying and multiple mornings of hangovers does for your GPA.

Quad "studying" becomes the norm.
Everyone loves studying on the quad. But studying turns into gossip, then flag football, and ultimately, afternoon naps in the sun. Your studying may suffer, but at least you're getting your daily dose of Vitamin D.

Is sitting in a dark classroom worth missing a pretty day?
Despite what your tuition bill may say, nope. Nothing (especially your monotoned chemistry teacher) is worth missing a nice day outside, especially when you've been cooped up inside all winter long.

There's a lot of drinking-themed holidays.
Spring is jam-packed with holidays. There's St. Patrick's Day, Easter, April Fools, and Cinco de Mayo. That means a whole lot of festivals, fools, margaritas, and partying. If you think you can keep your focus on school during all of this fun, I'll cheers to you tonight.

Hello, aller(geez).
Pollen is the nosiest of all of us; and every spring it welcomes itself. It's near impossible to convince yourself to go to class when you wake up with a nose so stuffy that you can't breathe and a sinus headache from down under. So what do you do? Take a 0 on your quiz or go to class with a tissue shoved up your nose? (Your choice, but personally, I'd take the 0 over my ego.)

Summer is so dang close.
They say to finish strong because you're almost done, but that's so much easier said than done. School work is annoying af any day, but having to go to class and do homework when it's warm outside and summer is weeks away just isn't an option.

So, hello spring and R.I.P. to my GPA.

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The Real World |  Source: robertomefe

Don't Check Out Now

A guide to keeping it together during the last month of school.

We were fooled by a perfect, warm week of spring break, and now we are all back at school feeling lost and unmotivated. The road to summer seems miles and miles away, even though it's only a month off. Although it's easier to start kicking back and letting summer mode take over, we have to do our best not to totally lose it by the end of the semester.

Keep in mind, there's still a lot of weight left in your grades. Even though it feels like there isn't a lot left, getting a bad grade on a test or project will probably lower your grade significantly, and we all know that once it's down, it's so hard to get back up.

Don't ruin it for yourself. Just keep up on schoolwork and focus as much as possible. You'll be glad you did. And if you want to test the waters and see what grade you need to get on a test to keep a decent percentage, use this simple grade calculator from Conquer College.

Get used to not having a break. In the real world, there usually aren't spring breaks and slack off weeks. Pushing yourself through things you might not want to do is going to mentally train you for life after undergrad.

Make your summer plans your reward. Remind yourself that more lazy days in the sun aren't too far away! Working hard now will make relaxation in May a lot more rewarding. And if you need a constant motivator, check out these "countdown to" apps.

Be the leader of your study group. Nothing gets you in the mindset to work more than encouraging others to work hard, too. Getting together with a group of people and leading a study session will help you in more ways than one.

Set boundaries for yourself. If you have trouble keeping yourself on track, plan out how each day should go. Don't just assume in your mind that you'll study when you have time after your last class. Form a schedule that governs how much time you will spend on studying in one day. Knowing that there is a stopping point will make it easier to keep going, rather than thinking you can stop studying whenever you want.

Trade a couple of Netflix marathons and a few hours of sleep to save your final grade. It sucks and is so difficult to do sometimes, but remember the motivation you once (hopefully) had, and how much good it did for you. And then enjoy your above 3.0 end to the semester, followed by a satisfying, well-earned summer!

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The Real World |  Source: @jakestrongphotog

The Best Spring Break Body Playlist

Because swimsuits, duh.

With spring break just around the corner, I'd be willing to bet that most of you are slowly growing more and more conscious of that holiday weight you've gained over the last month or so. You're counting down the days until you can sit your ass in the sand and dip your toes in the water, but you're also counting down the days until all of Cabo has to see you in a swimsuit.

I'd love to tell you that there's some magic pill to snap you into shape just in time, but the only way to look better and feel better is to hit the gym. While two months may seem like plenty of time to tone up and slim down, it'll fly by before you even realize it. Which means that saying "I'll start tomorrow" is going to end in you starting never.

Trust me, I get it. Forcing yourself to get up and workout in the midst of a presumably hectic student schedule can seem like a lot without the right motivation and the right playlist. Since I can't really help you with the getting to the gym part, I've decided to give you a little help for while you're there.

I've compiled a playlist full of all of the best songs to keep you going and keep you working. They'll pump you up and spark up that energy you needed to knock out 30 minutes on the stair climber.