Top 5 Beach Blunders
Real Talk |  Source: L. Smith, Shutterstock

Top 5 Beach Blunders

Everybody has a beach horror story.

Hitting the beach is a mandatory part of the summer. It doesn't matter if you're staying at a resort or if your budget has you limited to Ocean Shitty, because when it comes down to it, just lying in the sand and taking a dip is all you really need.

Once you're at the beach though, it seems like there's no limit to what can happen. There's the classic "my bikini top fell off" moment that almost everyone has gone through (right?) and for my fellow fair-skinned friends, that one blistering burn we'll never forget.

But, I asked my friends for their serious blunders at the beach... and these were some stories they were brave enough to share that no amount of aloe vera could relieve you from:

1. Burnt Bum
I can turn tan eventually, but I always need that "base burn," especially for those areas that never see the light of day. Tanning while on my stomach for a few hours, I woke up to find my ass absolutely lobstered with finger streaks from my half assed (literally) sunscreen job. I wouldn't let my bf touch me for a week.

2. Sandy Situation
I forgot to do a real shave before going out, so I quickly dry razored it before heading out in my bikini. I naturally swam around in the salt water... but days later I noticed a massive, painful red bump at my bikini line that grew into a cyst... I had no idea what it was - turns out, I had sand get inside an ingrown hair.

3. Puppy Probz
My family decided to take a vacation together to the beach, and we brought our brand new puppy, who was still going through the "chews everything in her path" phase. She got inside my bag when I was out and chewed out the crotch in my two way-overpriced bikinis. I was horrified.

4. Passed Out/Up Opportunities
Senior week I was hardcore trying - key word, TRYING - to flirt with my crush. To up my confidence, I drank far too much. Combination of dehydration and the heat, I both puked and passed out on the beach in front of everyone. He ended up getting with my friend instead that night.

5. Birthday Suit
I was renting a beach house with my friends and a group of guys were staying a few houses down from us. I started flirting with one guy in particular, and we went out one night, but the tide was strong. It ripped off my suit entirely, and I didn't know what to do, so I bolted to my house naked and couldn't bear to show my face again to him.

6. Can't Cover Up That Mark
While I was sleeping, my friends made a sunscreen penis on my face. I had to put on a shit ton of makeup on to show my face at work for a week straight.

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Real Talk |  Source: L. Smith, LULU'S

10 Bathing Suits That Are Great On A College Budget

Cue tan lines.

For all of the hassle that bikinis and bathing suits cause, you'd think they'd at least be in our price range. Unfortunately, we all know that's not true.

It's really easy to blow serious money on bikinis, especially, considering they price the tops and bottoms separately. But, there are bathing suits out there for the penniless college student in need of a summer tan - to prove they actually spent some time outside.

1. Forever 21 South Beach Tassel Set


source: forever21.com

$38

2. Lulus Happy Thought Black Bikini


source: lulus.com

$34

3. Lulus Daylight Dance Royal Blue Mesh Bikini


source: lulus.com

$34

4. Zara Tropical Bikini With Colorful Elastic Straps


source: zara.com

$13

5. Aerie Lightly Lined Macrame Bikini


souce: ae.com

$21

6. Aerie Strapless Lightly Lined Bikini


source: ae.com

$24

7. Nordstrom Far & Away Wrap Bikini


source: nordstrom.com

$30

8. Nordstorm Salt Water Solid's One-Piece


source: nordstrom.com

$41

9. Nordstrom Animalia One-Piece



source: nordstrom.com

$48

10. Poppoly Cut To It Shell Black One-Piece


source: poppoly.com

$23

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Real Talk |  Source: FlockU, Shutterstock

Car Horror Stories

Warning: lots of bodily fluid.

That sweet glorious day we got our license was our first taste of *freedom* and independence. It was beautiful, but not quite fully appreciated.... until we owned our first car.

Let's be honest with ourselves; we all grew a deep connection with our first car. Maybe you even named yours; mine was Babe, a 2001 Ford Escape in an obnoxious cherry red, easily spotted from across the parking lot. That tank of a car had been with me through the thick and thin, but did I do a number on it? Absofreakenlutely.

Despite the love we have for our car, we all have our own horror stories- some definitely worse than others. Here are just a few to share with you, because it just feels nice knowing we're not the only one to have bad luck [or just try plain stupid shit] in our cars.

Or, you could join Zipcar and never have to worry about any of the headaches like insurance, gas or having a dirty car, but I digress.

bluntblonde, 23
I'd had my car and license for a grand total of a month before I got into a serious accident involving the entire left backside of a cargo truck smashing into my passenger side. My life seriously flashed before my eyes-- more at the fact I could never pay for the damages [worth more than my actual car]. Luckily it was the other guy's fault and insurance laws changed in my state that year so they didn't total my car.

Abby, 21
I was babysitting an eight year old who said she couldn't hold it for a 10 minute drive and I didn't believe her. Let's just say I tell all passengers to avoid the middle seat.

Sophia, 22
I had to go to an interview for a post-grad job and my car wouldn't start. Needless to say didn't get the job.

Jamie, 21
During Snowmageddon in DC, I was stupid and tried driving to get food. My car got stuck in between snowbanks and I had to escape through the window and ask strangers to shovel me out.

Lee, 20
Locked myself out of my car, with my wallet and phone also in the car. I had to flag down someone to call Triple A and wound up being two hours late for work.

Rylee, 20
I have a bad habit of paying for gas at $2 at a time. My car completely ran out of gas on an eight lane road while I was driving two friends. Luckily we were already on the side lane... but I got a ton of honks and was mortified forcing my friends to help with the push method.

Kate, 19
I let a friend borrow my car to pick up someone at the airport. When she came back, the whole bumper was banged in and she offered no explanation.

Ben, 21
Forgot I left a pair of cleats in my car after practice in the rain. When I went to use my car two days later, I couldn't breathe my car reeked so bad.

Manuel, 20
I had to deposit a check but couldn't find any parking spots, so I parked illegally thinking it would only be a few minutes. Came back and my car was towed.

Everyone has their own horror story about owning their own car. Prevent them from happening and just book a Zipcar.

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Real Talk |  Source: FlockU, Shutterstock

Getting Over An Embarrassing Moment

I am still alive after all of my embarrassing moments.

If you knew me, you'd know my life was a never-ending saga of embarrassing stories. Perhaps worst of all, was this incident.

A boy I had a sustained thing with, Ben, invited me to his Christmas formal. He was leaving for a semester abroad in January, so this would be the last time I saw him until the next school year.

During the night, we played drinking golf, which means a different drink every hour. Rum and coke, then Gin and Tonic, then wine, then Long Island Ice Tea, then tequila shots, then Bloody Mary's. I blacked out after the Bloody Mary, so it's entirely possible there were more rounds.

Either way, I didn't make par. He helped me to his bed in the fraternity house (before the formal finished) when I felt sick. When he returned later to check on me, I had thrown up all over his bed and myself. The next morning I got up at 6 AM and snuck the fuck out.

Later that day, a friend with a boyfriend in that fraternity texted me saying, "You got sick in Ben's bed??!" I hadn't told anyone except my roommates, so I asked her how she knew. "There was an email on the fraternity listserv with things overheard at formal. One of the things said, 'Ben why are you sleeping on the couch in the middle of formal?'

'Because my date vommed all over my room.'"

So, yes, an entire fraternity knew I massacred Ben's bed with vomit. And that was the last I saw Ben for nine months. Yet, here I am, alive and (sort of) thriving.

Whether your embarrassing moment is big (like this) or small, you'll survive too. If you need help getting over the initial shock and reverberations of an awkwardly distressing incident, this is my tried and true manual.

When it happens, relax.
Don't overreact right when it happens. Don't cry, force weird laughter, run away, or exaggeratedly call it out. This makes an even bigger deal of the situation. Take a deep breathe, acknowledge it casually with a small laugh and a "sorry about that," "oops" "that was embarrassing," or "I'm a doof," and move on.

Realize it's probably not as embarrassing as you think.

I get embarrassed really easily, but when I mention the distressing moments to my friends they don't understand the big deal. I realized when I consider similar incidents with others, I don't think it's as embarrassing.

We are harshest on ourselves and also much more aware of everything that happens to us (because it's our lives). So, know that you're the only one who observed and vividly remembers all the details and deems it as embarrassing.

Stop analyzing it.
We have a tendency to repeatedly play embarrassing moments in our heads. And not just replay, but analyze the situation with scrutiny.

You think about what you could've done to prevent it, how you could've reacted better, what everyone else thought of it then and now. Stop it. The only thing continuously replaying and analyzing the moment does is makes you cringe more.

Know this too shall pass.
Think about all the times you wanted to change your name and move far away so that you didn't have to face the aftermath of an accidental indiscretion. But you didn't (and not just because you didn't want to have to deal with going to the DMV to change your license).

You lived to tell the tale and you're more than perfectly fine. With time, this too will turn into a memory that's probably pretty insignificant in the grand scheme of life.

Reach out to friends.
Whenever I get really embarrassed, I turn to my friends. They are good at reassuring me of all the things I've mentioned above (that it's actually not that big of a deal, to stop thinking about it, and that I'll get over it soon).

They also usually send me back embarrassing stories about themselves and how they've survived. These stories help me realize I'm human and it's expected that sometimes I'm a little stupid, like all my other fellow humans.

Learn from the incident.
Every uncomfortable moment is an opportunity to grow. It's a chance to think about how you deal with adversity and consider ways to strengthen this process.

If the embarrassing moment was caused by a not so wise decision, reflect. If it was drinking related, should you reconsider how you drink? If you messed up in class, are there avenues to prevent future similar mistakes? Can you work on your interactions with people? Use the momentary cringing to learn.

Find humor in the situation.
If you consider the situation from a different perspective, it's probably at least a bit funny. Finding the humor helps you better internalize the normal reality of it all and get over it.

Plus, it makes for good stories. When I recount stories of my uncomfortable encounters, people tend to feel more comfortable with me because they realize I'm a real person who makes mistakes and looks silly.

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Real Talk |  Source: K.C. Uthus, Shutterstock

Screw The Scale This Summer

You should just throw it out

Everywhere you turn, you can find magazines, posters, ads, you name it flashing in our faces that dreaded question: ARE YOU BIKINI BODY READY?? While we're overjoyed that the semester is over and summer is here at last, the thought of jumping into a suit soon after the Finals 15 (that's a thing, right?) can be traumatizing.

Very often, we correlate the weight on the scale with how we look and our worth. I will be the first to admit I used to be obsessed with stepping on the scale any chance I had. I felt genuinely ugly and worthless if I went up two pounds in a day, regardless of the fact water weight is REAL.

This was during my full fledged eating disorder, when at 5-foot-6 I dropped down to a measly 107 pounds- extremely thin for an athlete and someone with a larger frame like myself. The obsession I had with the number consumed my thoughts, actions, mood, everything.

I eventually went to therapy and after many years have reached a point where I am relatively comfortable with my weight. For my own personal sanity, I forego ever stepping on a scale except when required for my yearly physical.

I'm embarrassed to say I still dread that moment, despite knowing the number means NOTHING. I repeat- the number means NOTHING.

Today I'm around 145-ish (something like that), but I'm much fitter, have more muscle, and look a ton healthier. Oh, and guess what? You can google search for days and find countless number of women who've had this same experience, and bravely have shared photos of before and after, often weighing more when they "felt their best." These badass women serve as true inspiration for us in proving the exact same thing; aka #screwthescale.

I had to get in a #transformationtuesday before my day gets hectic! ? Whenever I post about food I get a lot of messages about how tall I am, what I weigh, how many calories I eat etc. ? soo I want to just address it here and join in on the #screwthescale movement! ?????? I really don't weigh myself regularly and could not care less about that number, however I know my weight during these photos as they were taken during significant times in my fitness journey: LEFT is pre #bbg MIDDLE is halfway through round 1 and RIGHT is after one week of #macros ? (also there are 14 months between left and right) ? SO, clearly the important change (physically) is body composition, not the number! ?? also as for my actual macro numbers, I don't want to share them because they are specific to me and I don't want anyone to emulate what I'm doing in case it's wrong for them ? if you're interested, I'd encourage you to have someone calculate them for you! I had mine calculated by the babe @paosfitworld ? xoxo ? #bbgprogress #bbgprogresspic #bbgtransformation #bbgcommunity #bbggirls #fitspo #fitnessmotivation #transformation #macros #bbgsisters #fitness #workout #beforeandafter #fitgirls #fitnesstransformation

A post shared by Arielle (@theblondeefiles) on

It's not a matter of "not being beautiful" before they changed their lifestyles, because they are. We all are. But it is a comfort for people like myself to know that the number is just a number.

The saying "muscle weighs more than fat" isn't accurate because a pound is a pound, but what is true is that muscle is much more dense than fat. Ultimately your body composition will affect that number on the scale, so there's no true basis for it.

At the end of the day, it's how you feel and not how much you weigh that matters the most. I know I feel best at this heavier weight, working the weight room and outsweating the dudes so I feel proud and more than deserving of that beach time!

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Real Talk |  Source: N. Leeper, Shutterstock

Walmart Horror Story

Some things you just can't unsee.

If you're ever looking for a confidence boost head on over to your local Walmart! You'll leave there feeling like a super model. You also will probably have some pretty interesting characters who come with just as interesting actions.

Because of this, I'd like to share one of my own Walmart horror stories. Since I am a broke college student, I have no shame in admitting that I shop at Walmart, but I will never go back there the same person.

The visit started off like any other Walmart visit, there were the usual suspects; unsupervised demon children, people with front butts and the occasional creeper.

While I was shopping around for stuff I probably didn't even need, the urge to pee came upon me (for some reason I pee like I'm an eight-month pregnant woman, so it's no surprise I had to make a pit stop to the bathroom). Little did I know I was about to enter a war zone.

Upon my first seconds of walking in I squished my face in, in disgust of the horrid smell. I'm a quick pee-er so I figured I could hold my breath long enough to do my business and get outta there. I went into the first stall and that's when I saw it.

There was shit everywhere!!!!!

I mean everywhere people, the floor, the walls, all over the toilet. It was like I was living inside of my worst nightmare. I wouldn't really consider myself an athletic person by any means; however, I doubt that anyone thought I was anything less than an Olympic track runner with the way I dipped out of there. I didn't even buy the stuff I needed because I was that disgusted. I felt like the smell was stuck up in my nose.

Some things you just can't unsee...

Anyways, I ended up going to Target and have yet to ever step foot into a Walmart bathroom since.