40 Thoughts You Have When Your Friend Is A Bad Driver
College Life |  Source: @kirsty

40 Thoughts You Have When Your Friend Is A Bad Driver

...Other than a slow-mo montage of your life before your eyes.

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When living on a college campus, the simple pleasures of being able to cruise to unwalkable distances on your own time, in your own car, playing your own music is a thing of the past for most of us vehicle-less students.

In these dark times for transportation in our lives, there is usually a token friend with a car on campus who can swoop in for the rescue when in desperate need of a Target run or when the calling for off campus food becomes too strong to ignore. Which is great! Until you realize that your chauffeur, who, don't get it twisted, you are very grateful for, thinks they are auditioning for the ninth Fast and Furious (really, eight just wasn't enough?)

Riding passenger with this kind of friend, will go a little something like this...

1. Literally what would I do if I didn't have a friend with a car?

2. It's honestly amazing that they're even willing to drive me around.

3. Man, my friends are so selfless.

4. I'm such a great judge of character.

5. My friends would really do anything for me.

6. TBH I don't know why...

7. Not a shot in hell I'd be chauffeuring anybody around if I had a car.

8. Am I a bad person?

9. Self reflection can happen later, right now I just need to get off this campus.

10. Driving me around AND they're giving me AUX privileges? Beautiful.

11. And guess what?

12. Mom's not around so I'm not putting on my seat belt.

13. HAH!

14. Livin' on the edge.

15. Alright comin' up on a yellow light.

16. This is where we separate the boys from the men.

17. On second thought there's no way we're making this light.

18. Well I guess they have other plans.

19. Goin 80 through an intersection in a 40 zone okay nbd

20. Not like that's where cops watch for speeders or anything.

21. Whatever, their ticket not mine.

22. I mean at least this'll be an efficient trip, right?

23. Alright back to the AUX.

24. That was definitely a stop sign we just went through...

25. Hmm they don't seem phased maybe I imagined that.

26. No one ever drives around this college town anyway.

27. But maybe they shouldn't be playing Candy Crush and driving?

28. Just a suggestion...

29. Don't want to be annoying though, they are voluntarily driving me after all.

30. Should just keep my thoughts to myself and stay in my lane.

31. Speaking of people who should stay in their lane...

32. On second thought, that seatbelt sounds pretty nice.

33. So maybe this wasn't the moves...

34. I do really need to do some errands though.

35. ...but I also value my life

36. The perennial struggle.

37. Gotta think of something different next time.

38. I could just walk.

39. Or there is Zipcar.

40. Or maybe a razor scooter?

Next time, I'm just reserving a Zipcar so I can drive myself.

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College Life | 

No Mo' FOMO

Don't compromise who you are to avoid FOMO.

FOMO, amiright? It's become a college student's downfall, influencing us to give attention to things we don't have the time, energy or desire for. Before this term was coined, we seemed to have a little more control over our priorities.

Think about it: We've all had those nights when you come home after a long day at the library, take a shower and slip into some sweatpants, only to get the text: "Everyone" is going out and it's going to be the "best time ever". You are so tired and comfortable, but FOMO is slowly but surely pulling you away from your bed. If everyone else is going, you have to go, too. You convince yourself it's going to be the best time ever, but in reality it's just another night at Tin Roof Bar you may not even remember. Take a step back and realize this opportunity will more than likely present itself again--so don't feel bad about saying no.

We're poor college students. The little money we do have seems to disappear so quickly. You haven't bought yourself a new dress in months and you've become acquired to the taste of egg sandwiches and ramen noodles. This coming weekend you know you need to stay in and save money, so you've made plans to catch up on homework and binge-watch rom-coms.

But Saturday morning rolls around and your phone blows up with day plans for the game. You've worked so hard pinching pennies all week, and to throw it away now... but FOMO calls and suddenly has you checking all your coat pockets for loose change. So before you call an Uber and blow your budget, think about the regret that will follow on Sunday morning. And don't feel bad about sitting this one out.

FOMO isn't exclusive to social events. It also applies to beauty, fashion and technology. If you don't have the latest iPhone, you feel FOMO. If you didn't have ombre hair at one point, you feel FOMO. If your nails aren't constantly painted with latest gel color, you feel FOMO. If you haven't listened and memorized every new Justin Bieber song, you feel FOMO. Even if something doesn't interest us, we still make ourselves do it in order to avoid the fear of missing out. Don't compromise who you are to avoid FOMO.

Missing out on a few things here and there won't change your destiny. When you do something to simply not miss out, or to just to say you were a part of it, you're aren't going to enjoy it, anyway. Plus, it's a waste of time. Do what makes you happy, not what you think you should be doing or--God forbid--what everyone else is doing.

The only fear you should have is the fear of not staying true to yourself.

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College Life |  Source: insideedition.com

The Life of a College Commuter

It's not that bad.

COMMUTER NATION STAND UP...on the subway next to a tired nurse and a homeless man who hasn't showered in months. Being a commuter in college is no easy ride; pun intended. There's an interesting mix of highs and lows; all of which correspond heavily to how the daily commute went that day.

I remember one day I gave a presentation about the Vietnam War in my history class. My teacher loved it. The class loved it. I felt like a million bucks. Then, just two short hours later, I was sitting next to a man dragging an oxygen tank as we both waited for our stop on the bus. Bleak.

There's a bunch of ways to get to school. You can take the bus...the subway...maybe drive if you have a car. There are perks and downsides to all these forms of transportation. Let's take a look at them:

1. Bus
Nothing is worse than the bus. Sitting next to a random person while a tired driver with a heavy foot stops at every block is enough to kill you...but it's a lot cheaper than Uber.

2. Subway
The subway is always interesting. Only on the subway will you see a businessman, a transvestite, and a live musical performance on your morning commute. The subway is often times a hot, claustrophobic nightmare...but is there anything faster?

3. Car
Last but not least, the beloved car. It is the holy grail of the commuting world. The freedom to get in your own car after a long day of classes is as good as it gets. Yes, you have to sit in traffic sometimes, but rotting in your own car as opposed to a bus makes the world of a difference.

All in all, commuting is really not as bad as it seems. You get to live at home and eat home cooked meals, you save a ton of money not paying for housing, and the "I got stuck in traffic" excuse almost never fails with your college professors.

But yeah...commuting still sucks.

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College Life |  Source: youtube.com

Shaq Driving a Lyft Undercover

Don't talk to him about Kobe.

In the most recent segment of Undercover Lyft, NBA great Shaquille O'Neal dons a couple of different disguises and takes customers for a ride.

The most unbelievable part of these videos isn't that people don't recognize these famous athletes (though c'mon, how do you not know it's Shaq?), it's that these ordinary people are riding shotgun. Who the hell rides in the front of a Lyft?

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College Life |  Source: Kali Ciesemier

Thoughts You Have While Living The Fast-Casual Dining Life

It's the convenience of fast food blended with the ability to convince myself I'm eating healthy!

Fuck waking up at 8 a.m. for this bio lab.

Hmm I wonder what I should get for breakfast?

That reminds me... I wonder what I'll eat for dinner?

I could finally put the communal kitchen to use and whip up something amazing.

Who am I kidding, I don't have time to cook.

Or know anyone I could convince to join me in eating my own cooking.

Or know how to cook.

I should probably learn how to cook before I become an adult.

Holy shit I'm going to starve once I graduate and don't have a dining hall.

I'm going to be homeless.

I'm going to be a homeless college grad with four years of college tuition to pay off.

I need to get my life together holy shit.

I need to find an internship for this summer what am I doing!

Can't do that until I figure out what I'm gonna do about dinner though.

Right, where was I?

So cooking's a no.

This whole all you can eat set up is not boding well for my spring break bod.

But the dining hall sweet potato fries though...

CANCUN IS UPON US!!!

Okay need to get off campus.

Somewhere fast, must get back to the library in time to snag the good desks.

And must get home before The Bachelor.

Fast-casual it is.

~10 hours later~

Ahhh dinner, the most important meal of the day as they say.

So what'll it be what'll it be?

Panda Express? Can't even pretend that one's healthy.

Panera? To basic.

Chipotle? Is the whole E-coli thing still happening orrr...

Jimmy Johns? Nah had that six times last week.

Let's just see where the wind takes us.

Maybe the new local fast-casual.

Can't be bad.

Guess I'll call an Uber.

Wish I had a car on campus.

I should get a side job so I can buy my own car.

Maybe I can apply for one at the restaurant when I go.

Nah everyone hates working in the restaurant biz.

I see myself in a corporate position anyway.

CEO of some sort.

I'll have to look into that.

Ahh, here we are at last.

Food get in my belly.

Ohh it smells so good.

Great decision, I am a genius.

I am the smartest person to ever grace this campus.

Okay, what to order what to order.

I love how the ingredients are right in front of me where I can see em.

I really know exactly what's going into my body.

I wonder how long that food's been sitting out here actually...

Do they replenish it every day?

Or has that been sitting here since last week...

Nah that would be illegal.

Right?

Oh I'm up, shit!

I don't know what I want.

Speak, hurry he's waiting for your order!

Gahh don't wanna fuck up, so many options!

God damnit now there's a line behind me.

Alright just go, it's all going to the same place anyway.

Okay I think I did fine.

Phew.

Time to pay.

Ugh I hate using real money and not dining dollars.

Wait it's only eight bucks?

Oh hell yes.

I'm coming here everyday.

Alright food, come to mama.

Amazing.

This is amazing.

Best thing I've ever tasted.

And I created this.

I should become a chef.

They should create a special named after me.

I'm coming here every day.

New fav spot.

I must tell everyone immediately.

Or keep it all to myself...

Alright time to go.

I'm so satisfied and still have so much time in my night wow!

Back to the lib.

Actually, you know what...

I think earned myself the night off.

The library will always be there tomorrow.

You just earned yourself extra Netflix time.

Well done.

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College Life | 

Thoughts You Have During a Bad Hookup

Smells like jizz.

We've all had our fair share of bad hookups, from the lizard kissers to those weirdos who insist on keeping their socks on the entire time. It's practically a rite of passage in college. But this dude takes it to a whole new level - cheese breath and premature ejaculation? Get it together, fam.

Also, who still watches Jeopardy?