10 Things Girls Wish Guys Knew About Their Lady Parts
Sex & Relationships |  Source: @msyrko

10 Things Girls Wish Guys Knew About Their Lady Parts

The urethra and the vagina are two different things, for one.

For as much as I write about sex, you'd think that I would have covered this topic by now. Sometimes guys can be pretty clueless in general, but when it comes to what's going on with a woman's body, it's like they're trying to understand a foreign language.

So I'm here, not for the ladies, but for the dudes out there who need to get educated. It's time you understand what's actually going on with our lady parts, for our sake and yours.

1. Vaginas. Do. Not. Stretch.

I'm not exactly sure where this myth came from or how it's stuck around this long, but it is absolutely not true. Our vaginas are made to push human children out of them - your dick is nothing compared to that. Think of our vaginas as rubber bands: no matter how wide you stretch it, it's going to snap back to its original size. Same concept down under.

2. A UTI is not gross, it's a normal part of being a girl.

Basically a UTI happens when bacteria gets trapped in the urethra and bladder, and then multiplies in the urine. Not in the vagina, just to be clear. Avoid them by peeing after sex (and wiping front to back. Yes, I'm serious. And no, not everyone does that.) Oh, and dudes can get them, too.

And if you do happen to get a UTI? Don't freak out - just see a doctor to get antibiotics. And, while you wait for your doctor's appointment, try Cystex Urinary Pain Relief Tablets, which can help with the God-awful pain and burning caused by a UTI, and also contain an antibacterial to keep the infection from spreading while you wait.

3. Trying to put anything in a vagina when it's not wet is the worst.

Do. Not. Do it. I'm trying to think of what I could compare this to for a man to understand, but I honestly think this may be a feeling all its own. It burns and it's uncomfortable and there is no way we're going to ever actually get wet if that's all we're feeling. So either lube it up yourself, or focus on the foreplay before getting down to business.

4. Most of us can't get off just by vag stimulation.

Those of us who can are few and far between and so oh-so-blessed. While I don't know the actual reasoning behind this, because it still does feel amazing, I do know that it's not enough to get the job done. For a girl to orgasm, we need to get the whole body involved. Foreplay is key.

5. Our boobs get sore when it's that time of the month.

So for those of you who think keeping it above the waist is a reasonable request while we're on our periods, understand that even that sometimes, even this isn't a viable option, since during our periods our boobs can swell and ache.

6. Our boobs also have very few nerve endings.

While you may enjoy focusing on them during a hookup, for the most part, we aren't getting any physical pleasure out of it. Sure we love that you're so captivated by our bodies which is an important part of good sex, but it's not worth devoting your time to. You're getting more out of it than we are.

7. The clit is the Holy Grail.

This is the key to the mystery that is the female orgasm. If you want us to get off, focusing on this and knowing what to do with it is a must. I've honestly gotten off just by having a guy work it perfectly and I can't say the same of vaginal stimulation.

8. During "that time of the month" we are literally falling apart.

Literally. The insides of our uterus are falling off. Sorry for the TMI, but I'm hoping that knowing what's actually going on will help you cut us some slack when our periods are wreaking havoc. You try having your insides fall out 12 times a year. You'd be pretty pissed off, too.

9. Sometimes our vag has more of a smell than other times.

Let me first clarify that by smell, I don't mean an offensive odor. I mean that just like our breath and our natural aroma, our vaginas have their own smell, too, whether it's good or bad. While most of the time it's not noticeable, our diet, workout routine, and stress levels and affect it. I will say however that this shouldn't be anything you need to worry about unless you've got one near you in an...intimate way.

10. We do not control what comes out of our vaginas.

It's called discharge and it's not gross or weird or unnatural. The color, consistency, and odor can vary based off of different health factors and what part of our cycle we're in. So if you stumble upon already wet panties, don't get a head of yourself - you had nothing to do with it.

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6 Things Girls Actually Think About Your Dick Pic

Dick picks are usually tied with, well... dick personalities.

One of the brightest minds of our age, Nicole Richie, once asked, "So, is a dick pic is the new mixtape?" and the answer is yes, Nicole, a dick pic is in fact the new mixtape. There are one too many out there and they often aren't as great as the "artist" thinks that they are. At least Snapchat gives them a 10-second limit, saving your eyes the extra pain of staring at the little monsters while you go through the process of deleting it from your text messages. If you've ever wondered what goes through a girl's head after the initial shock of "What the actual fuck?", here it is for you boys.

1. Does he think this turns me on? There are a lot of ways to turn on a girl: fix your hair or your watch. Maybe bite your lips or grab her hips. A nice, intelligent conversation would also do the trick. There are a million other options that would do both of you a lot more good than snapping a pic of your dick and sending it her way. What guys don't know is that that actually has the exact opposite effect, they wanted to turn us on, but what they actually did is turn us off. Real quick.

2. Does he know how ugly those things are? Never in my life have I been getting busy with a guy and thought, "wow, what a masterpiece". No girl wants to look at your dick just to look at your dick. Honestly if we could somehow have sex and do other things without ever actually looking at it we would be pretty fucking happy.

3. How many other girls got this Snapchat? Lord knows, other than a boyfriend (who I hope does not send you dick pics), guys who send dick pics probably aren't the kind of guys who only have one girl they're sending it to. Dick picks are usually tied with, well... dick personalities. Chances are, at least one other girl got that snap. In fact, I know guys who will send their mini-mes to upwards of 4 girls. HAHAH gross.

4. Lol, does he think he gets a boob shot now? Because what you actually get is blocked from Snapchat, iMessage, and any other place one of those pics could pop up again. If girls wanted you to see their boobs, you'd see them, in person. No girl with self-respect is going to return your dick pic with a boob shot.

5. Why the hell did he actually think this was OK? Actually though, can we do a psychological experiment that figures out why guys do this? At what point did wiring in the male brain go so wrong that they thought we wanted a picture of one of the nastiest-looking things on this planet? Because newsflash: we don't.

6. ...? This represents those instances when you really just don't even know what to think. When things get so weird so quick and your mind literally cannot process it. For those, 0-100 situations.

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10 Girls Every Guy Will Sleep With

Which one are you?

While I'm pretty much an expert on the guys us ladies will sleep with - I'm also pretty knowledgeable in what kind of ladies you guys will sleep with. Just call me the "College Sex Guru", because that's pretty much what I am.

I know who you're going to fuck before you even know who you're going to fuck. I normally focus on lists that my fellow females can identify with, but I'm trying to promote gender equality here too, you know. How could I leave out my boys?

1. The stage-10 clinger. I'm just going to warn your right now boys, you're going to sleep with a girl who is then going to cling onto you with her life. Hate to break it to you, but it's pretty much solely because you guys hooked up.

She was probably a stage seven clinger pre-fuck (which is still pretty high), but to a girl like that, sex translates to love. To her, love is expressed by suffocating you with attention and neediness. Tread lightly and try to spot this girl before she grabs hold.

2. The girl from the bar. I always add someone from the bar to list, because it's true. The moment your bar life begins, you are destined to take someone home. I don't care who you are, it will happen. You'll send her a drink or if you're lucky she'll make the move.

Either way, you'll both be taking an Uber to your place, trying to keep your hands to yourself the whole ride. Live it up, my friend. Going home with the girl from the bar is just a part of life.

3. The "I slid into her DMs." I am actually going to force you to take a lie detector test if you say you've never hit a girl up on social media. Almost all guys have sent a DM in their life. I've gotten them from the hometown weirdo and the sexy collegiate quarterback, if you need further evidence that no man is above the DM.

Us ladies also aren't blind to the fact that you're DMing us because you find us attractive, which also means we aren't blind to the fact that sex is on your mind. But hey, it's 2016. Social media and sex just go hand and hand at this point, so don't be too ashamed.

4. Crazy ex-girlfriend. Just like a girl will sleep with a loser ex-boyfriend at some point in her life, you will sleep with a crazy ex-girlfriend. It's the most natural thing to do and the oldest story in the book. How you reconnect, I don't know. Maybe it'll be a run-in at the bar or a drunk booty call. Either way, you will sleep with one of your exes at some point and immediately regret it.

5. The frat-rat. At every frat party on any given night you can be sure to spot at least five frat rats. These are the girls who should be way over getting shit-faced in dark basements with sweaty douche-lords, but still find themselves tagging "Kappa Sig" or "Beta Theta Pi" in all of their Instagrams. This works out really well for you guys in houses because these girls lives are pretty much centered around trying to fuck you.

6. The emotionally unstable girl. God bless you if this is your crazy ex-girlfriend who also happens to be the stage 10-clinger, because if so, you're fucked. The emotionally unstable girl comes in many forms but will be easy to spot. It's hard to miss this level of crazy. She'll cry after sex, send you a dramatic post-hook up text, or do any number of other WTF things. Try to keep these ladies at bay.

7. Miss Down For Anything. AKA Miss "you can put it in my ass, my mouth, or anywhere else you can find to stick that thing." Sorry, but she's a hoe. Her number is definitely high and there is a good chance she's already gone home with a guy or two that weekend.

You might as well take advantage of it if that's what you're into. It's her body and if she's willing to let you do whatever, I say you do whatever. Just try not to be an asshole.

8. The "one of the guys" girl. Every group has the one girl who bros out more than she bonds with the ladies. She's a guys-girl. She'll chug a beer and scream at the game just as loud as you will and at some point you'll look at her and go, "wait, you're a girl and I want to fuck you." And you will. The good thing about this girl is she is probably pretty chill and you'll both be able to move on without any serious friendship damage.

9. The hit-it-and-quit-it. Want to know how I know you'll sleep with this girl? Because I am this girl. I'm not talking about you hitting and quitting it either. I'm talking about her hitting and quitting it. She wants you to come (cum) and leave. Nothing against you, she's just looking for sex and nothing more. You should respect this girl for her honesty. If guys can do it, so can she.

10. Virgin. It's inevitable that at some point in your sex life you'll find yourself in the position of "deflowerer." There isn't much to say about this one. If it hasn't happened, it will. It's just how this shit goes. We all fuck a virgin at some point. Just make sure she's your own age, pal.

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Boys Will Be Boys: Things Girls Hate that Guys Will Never Stop Doing

Why do you have to like every hot girl's pic on Insta? Y?

I think it's fair to say that guys are probably the most frustrating specimen on the planet. It's also probably fair to say that they say the same about us. In reality, most of the stupid shit that guys do is completely harmless and not all guys are annoying as shit, but I'd be willing to bet all of us ladies have dealt with--and become incredibly frustrated by--these things all guys do.

Following borderline pornographic accounts on Instagram: Possibly one of the absolute most annoying and frustrating things a girl can experience is seeing the guy they're into liking pictures of girls wearing nothing but a thong and barely covering their boobs with god knows what. But guess what, babe? They aren't going to stop anytime soon.

Liking every hot girl's picture they come across: Maybe even slightly more annoying than the previously mentioned Instagram habit, because these are actually hot girls they know. Realistically your boyfriend isn't going to do anything more than like those pictures, but it can still really piss you off to see your man liking pics of girls with their boobs half out.

"Bro-ing" out: AKA acting like a completely obnoxious and loud asshole anytime they're around more testosterone. You just have to understand that men are literally giant children. While this doesn't mean that they're completely incapable of being mature most of the time, it does mean when they get around their "bros", they do lose all maturity*. They'll burp, drink, fight, and talk about girls in ways you wish they didn't. But it's just how men work. *scientific fact

Being overwhelmingly oblivious: Sometimes when your guy is asking why you're mad, he genuinely does not know why, even if it's painfully obvious. They just don't get it. They don't understand when you're trying to drop hints, they don't get why you don't want to spend every weekend hanging with his friends, and they really don't get why you're mad that they're constantly not texting you back. They're just living their lives with their head in the clouds--or up their ass.

Checking out hot girls in public: Sorry girl, but if another lady walks by with double Ds, they're going to look. It's male instinct. If a girl walks by with a Kardashian ass, they're going to sneak a glance. While I 100 percent get why It drives you insane, it's harmless. Hell, if a girl walked by with a Kardashian ass I'd be staring too.

Screaming at the TV during sports games: I have yet to meet a man who watches sports and does not do this. I grew up in a home where I learned Monday and Sunday nights during football season are a great time to make plans outside of the house. No matter how many times you try to tell them that their fantasy football quarterback cannot actually hear them screaming advice or cursing at them, they are still going to shout like the players can hear every word.

Being shitty texters: This one really ties back into the oblivious point, and while sometimes guys are being shitty texters because they just aren't interested, some actually just suck at texting. They're in their own world, "bro-ing" out, doing god knows what else, and just generally space out on texting back.

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What Reading a Book About Eating Vagina Taught Me

Blind, aggressive rubbing does nothing for nobody.

I recently was recommended a book about eating vagina. No, not by my ex. That would have been rude af. By a friend of mine who's thoroughly interested in the art of oral sex. The book is called She Comes First by Ian Turner. Here's what I learned.

Don't be a selfish lover. It's kind of in the title. (She comes first.) Have some consideration for your sexual partner. Everyone deserves an orgasm. So make her orgasm before you even think about getting yours. It's common courtesy.

The clit is vital. I never knew how important the clit was until I read this book. It's absolutely vital when it comes to stimulating the ladies. Nothing gets them as riled up as clitoral action. Of course, half of the task is actually finding the damn thing. It's really well hidden, but it's worth the search. Trust me. Seventy percent of women have had an orgasm from clitoral stimulation alone. That's enough motivation to go on your treasure hunt for the clit. It has 8,000 nerve endings, twice as many as the penis; and is divided up into 18 parts. It's the only organ whose sole function is sexual pleasure. USE IT.

Being born with a small penis isn't the end of the world. If you were dealt a short hand at birth, so what? As far as I'm aware, God blessed most people with tongues, right? So use it! Make up for your weak dick game with mad tongue skills.

The area between the asshole and the vagina is a hidden spot of pleasure. It's called the perineum and it's a soft bit of flesh filled with nerves between the asshole and the vagina that can send waves of pleasure through your partner when stimulated appropriately.

There are various vagina eating techniques. One of these techniques is called the "Elvis Presley Snarl." It involves raising the side of your upper lip up to expose your teeth. She then rubs her clitoris on your exposed gum which usually leads to an intense climax. Crazy, right!?

The tongue is mightier than the sword. No matter how crazy your dick game is, it pales in comparison to the tongue. Women reported that they reached orgasm 25 percent of during intercourse alone, while they reached orgasm 81 percent of the time with tongue action alone.

When she says, "Yeah, don't stop, I'm gonna come" DO NOT FUCKING STOP! Continue doing what you're doing at the same pace and with the same intensity. Do not change anything at all, or you'll ruin it. It's like driving a manual car when you lift up the clutch to the bite point. If you press down too hard, you'll lose the bite point. If you lift the clutch up to high, the car will stall. Just stay where you are and things will run smoothly.

Blind, aggressive rubbing does nothing for nobody. Admit it. You've done it before. Opening up your palm and just rubbing blindly in the pubic region hoping you're doing something right. No, no, no. There's a chance you may get it right, but there's also a chance you could be annoying her to pieces and not to mention rubbing her raw. Take time to find the clitoris, and then play with it varying between fast and slow movements.

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Sex & Relationships |  Source: adequateman.deadspin.com

What Kind Of Threesome Is Right For You?

It's about a lot more than asking "with two boys or two girls?"

When the social dam between people breaks, the flowing of sexual stories and preferences is inevitable. One of the most common sexual topics to arise is the menage a trois - the "have you ever had a threesome?" question. Depending on your answer, the next question is probably some form of, "with two girls or two boys?"

Having been approached with three separate threesome invitations and taking up one of the offers, I think the better question is, "who would you want to be in the threesome?" It is much more interesting and important to consider what kind of relationship the people engaging in the three-way fuck maintain.

I never really thought about this until my first invitation for group sex. I was asked by a couple, and I initially wanted to say no. I thought I would be the odd man out, like a naked voyeur in the middle of a couple's shagfest.

The boy told me he had always wanted to have sex with me, and his girlfriend, who was interested in experimenting with girls had also always been sexually attracted to me. He also assured me I would be a special guest they were both trying to seduce and please. They had sex with each other many times, but they were curious about how I liked to be kissed and touched. I realized I might like being the third to a couple.

In the threesome offer I accepted, I was an object of desire for both the boy and girl of the couple, and that turned me on. When we all had sex, I did (for the most part) feel like a special guest invited to play in their bed.

There are pros and cons to all scenarios, but some trios can be better suited to certain people. Read on and think about what might be best in the event a threesome comes a'knockin'.

With a best friend of the same sex.
Pros
You're comfortable with this person and probably don't mind being naked or expressing your sexuality in front of them. Your friendship might have you very physically in sync. It could make a great story and make your bond closer.
Cons
Same-sex friendships are prone to competitiveness; you could find yourself jealous, craving attention over your friend and relishing in the fact if it happens. If you hook-up and realize feelings are involved, that could rupture the friendship. Or, you might not find your friend sexually alluring, and, thus, the threesome.

With a best friend of the opposite sex.
Pros
If you are heterosexual, chances are you've probably wondered what it would be like to fuck (maybe even hoped for it), and a threesome could be a safe way to experiment. You probably would also feel comfortable, which could lead you to open up more easily.
Cons
If feelings end up being involved, it can make the threesome and aftermath uncomfortable. You might also realize your friend is more like a sibling, which actually turns you off. Even as just a friend, you could find yourself jealous.

With two good friends.
Pros
You all know each other, so the dynamic could foster a relaxing and satisfying experience where you aren't afraid to explore and speak up. You might find yourself as the frequent focus, with everyone on somewhat equal footing in terms of desire and motivation.
Cons
If you are all good friends, it could be awkward mixing friendship and group sex. If there are already dynamics in place where two people are closer and there is jealousy involved, the threesome could exasperate the issue.

With a couple.
Pros
You might be the center of attention for a couple excited by a new addition to their sexual routine. You might be the star if one or both members of the couple are eager to sexually experiment with you. You could find yourself in the midst of a very open and experienced couple that expands your sexual horizon.
Cons
It's possible you could be the odd man out. You could find yourself in the middle of a couple-fight if things go awry, which could be even more troubling if you are friends with the couple.

With your S.O.
Pros
This could add another dimension to your physical and emotional closeness. You can use a threesome to maintain excitement in your sex life. You might find it sexy to watch how much your S.O. can turn another person on or like the idea of being watched with or by your partner.
Cons
If you aren't secure with yourself or the relationship, it could have disastrous consequences. You could also discover that a threesome was an attempt to save a failing relationship.

With two random people.
Pros
Not knowing the people removes a lot of concern about judgment, opening the opportunity to more free expression. And you don't have to worry about the impact on the relationships, so the focus is more on enjoying yourself.
Cons
It could turn into three people all vying for the focus of attention. You are putting yourself at a greater risk for catching STDs or being in a precarious position. You might feel totally disconnected with the experience without knowing anyone involved.